Life Tips from a Life Coach
Lisa Allen
If you had asked me if I needed a Life Coach 5 years ago, I would have said no. Then I found myself faced with a series of crossroads and transitions (some by my choice and others not). I was overwhelmed. Now, not to sound arrogant, but I am not the kind of gal that is afraid of decisions, or taking action. However, this season of my life took me by surprise and that's when I started working with a coach.
So what exactly is coaching? Gary Collins says in his book, Christian Coaching, "Coaching is the art and practice of enabling individuals and groups to move from where they are to where they want to be." Christian coaching is a collaborative partnership that creates movement and action. A lovely description of this in the Bible is, "Two are better than one, for they have a good return for their work" (Ecc. 4:9).
Would you like to try it out? Why don't you grab a cup of coffee, journal and pen and sit in the chair across from me as I coach you through a typical session. First, let's PRAY together that the Lord would reveal where HE is at work in this process. "The purposes of a man's heart are deep waters, but a man of understanding draws them out" (Proverbs 20:5). I join you in praying that God will use this time to "draw the things out of your deep waters."
PHASE I: These first questions are to create awareness of your present reality…where you are now. They will also begin to identify where you want to be, dreams, goals, tasks.
- How would you like your life to be different in one year? Consider areas of your life you are frustrated with or want to stop making the same choices.
- Now, what is getting in the way of these goals? Be specific. (I'm tired, I don't have time, I don't know how).
- List 3 things you are procrastinating or putting off in your life right now. These are things that you KNOW are there but you keep stepping around them or feel overwhelmed or even paralyzed to start.
As you are thinking, I have assembled several areas where I find my clients working. Perhaps these examples will help you identify your "felt need."
- Relationships (with God, family, boss)
- Calling (does my career/life align with my purpose, values, passion and wiring?)
- Projects (I need to…write that speech, prepare that presentation, paint my kitchen, reassign team responsibilities, write ministry goals for 2013)
- Time management, life balance, margin and white space
- Transition: to new job, marriage, divorce, empty nest, new parent, recent move
- Personal, professional or leadership development
- Physical (health, exercise, weight management)
PHASE II: At this point in our "cyber coaching session", I will ask you to identify ONE thing that you've written down that you want to focus on.
PHASE III: Now we will brainstorm all the resources you either HAVE or NEED in order to move you closer to accomplishing this goal. For example, if you want to change careers, then the resources you have or need could be: Linked In, friends with connections, recruiter, want ads, further education. Write down all the resources that come to your mind.
PHASE IV: What is one action step you can take NOW that will help you build the bridge between where you are and where you want to be? (For example, I am going to take a public speaking class to fine tune my presentation skills.)
The best way to help you write an action step is to make it a S.M.A.R.T. Goal: SPECIFIC, MEASURABLE, ATTAINABLE, REALISTIC and TIMELY. Now write down when you will take that step. Yes, I mean Tuesday at 4 pm I am going to schedule the time I need to____________. Now set your phone calendar to remind you that you have an appointment to take action that will bring you closer to your dream.
Libby Gill, LC says: "In a perfect world, everyone could figure this out for themselves, but we live in such a complicated time ... that most of us need all the help we can get."
If you took the time to work through this session, then I hope you feel lighter and more confident. As with any goal, it is helpful for you to tell a friend to help you keep focused. I believe in you as you pursue this dream and I would love to hear from any of you as your dreams become reality! (See bio below for contact information.)
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Our Expert
Lisa Allen enjoys challenging women to lay down the world's expectations of who they "should" be and live in the freedom of their true identity as the unique masterpieces God created. She lives in Charlotte, NC with her husband two children and is currently using her passion on the Outreach Team at Forest Hill Church where she leads Community Collaboration Initiatives and African Partnership Strategies. Contact Lisa at coach@LJAllenCoaching.com or visit her website www.ljallencoaching.com.
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